Friday, 25 November 2011

Plantar fibroma report

That's right you've guessed it today I'm not surprisingly giving another update on my life with plantar fibromatosis aka Ledderhose disease.

Well my blue badge pack arrived today, I've started filling it out and it's not quite as depressing as I was expecting, sure at the age if 24 it doesn't put a smile on my face to apply for a badge but I'm starting to come to terms with things being the way they are and having to make things as easy on myself as possible.

Got to say that some of it would be many guys dream, partner doing everything for you...again at first I just felt really helpless and pathetic but I know she is doing these things out of love and because it's what is best for me. May sound like I'm up myself or something but generally speaking I'm not used to it, I like doing kind things, it makes me feel good to see others smile and this is taking some of that away from me, hopefully I'll find other ways to contribute that don't require my foot, any ideas?

For those who don't know the blue badge is a parking permit that allows for the use of disabled spaces. Anyway...

My foot was of course not great today, I managed to sit a lot which I think helped a bit but I am concerned... The pain is not just in the lump, mainly the lump but the pain is also around my toes. The pain also however is in my ankle, this is a twisting thing caused by me walking on the outside of my foot day in day out, I'm not sure there is anything that can be done about this at the moment as this is a defense mechanism to stop my considerable weight from passing through my painful arch, just seems that the complete screwing up of my foot is, as expected, causing the pain to spread, the weight has to go somewhere after all.

One thing I also want to mention before I forget is how much I love my partner, she is awesome and fantastic, I love her so much that I almost want the pain to go more so that she doesn't have to see me suffering than so I don't have to suffer.

I've also been trying to find more forums out there to discuss plantar fibroma / Ledderhose or other blogs on plantar fibromatosis and I've been struggling to find much. If anyone knows of anything let me know, I'm really finding it hard to find numbers on how much people with Ledderhose lose the ability to bend their toes, I've seen lots of people telling their stories but none mention this outside of the context of suffering from it with the hand form of the disease.

I'm now lying in bed typing this post on my phone, an awesome htc sensation it has to be said and I can feel the lump in my foot, I can feel the pain anyway, the regular twinges and just hope it'll be gone in the morning.... Pigs might fly and all that